owner

Hi, I’m Tim and this is my journal.

I’m a  skier, an avalanche forecaster, a pilot, a husband, an endurance athlete, and most recently, a service member.

While I think that most people who find their way here probably already know me, it still seems prudent to introduce myself, if for no other reason than to help define this space, to define myself, as both are constantly changing.

Maybe you’re a personal friend or family member, or maybe you stumbled upon this space another way. You might have found it after diving down a rabbit hole of Google searches about bicycle-powered adventure or rock climbing around Leavenworth Washington. Maybe you read an article somewhere and and clicked on the Instagram handle next to my name. But regardless of how you got here…

Welcome, and thank you for being here.

Thanks for finding me, and taking a moment to look, listen, and consider some of my thoughts and experiences. The how and why of this space has continued to evolve over time, but some basic themes have persisted, despite my often narrow perception and routine neglect.

It’s a journal.

I’m sharing things with you in mind.

I don’t know what I’m trying to accomplish, but it feels right.

The internet is often a space of comfortable anonymity. A window which allows you to be an invisible voyeur, a faceless voice. This isn’t one of those places.

This is my place to share thoughts, ideas, feelings. What I create here doesn’t define me, nor can I deny it. I find that writing about your experiences and ideas can help preserve and progress them.

I like to write because I feel like it organizes and refines my often chaotic thoughts.

I like sharing those thoughts because I’m so often proven wrong, or enlightened. I think many of us feel more alone and confused about the world than we let on, and that when we share that we realize that we’re all in this together.

So often we experience moments of powerful importance, whether it’s an event or an idea, these often disappear just as quickly, like a wisp of smoke that only moments before was choking you. I’m trying to capture that, trying to take those formless, awkward feelings about what’s important or how we should live and press them into a shape, to refine and define them, and discover if they hold any truth.

I grew up in the 90’s in the small state of New Hampshire in the eastern United States. My childhood was a juxtaposition of rural heritage and ivy league culture. I found purpose in athletics, music, and art. My coming of age was a mix of anger, frustration, and awe. I found solace from the splintering of home and war of society in the chaos of wilderness.

Somehow I became an adult. Mostly through time, but occasionally I surprise myself with an inclination for organization and planning, for discipline. It wasn’t direction or a degree that got me here, I still get lost and question my purpose. I have worn many masks, tried many lives, I continue to be curious, to pursue challenges, always open to what lies ahead. Despite the chaos and trial and error of my younger life, there were always constants, the mountains, adventure, amazing friends and a supportive family chief among them. 

For a time I gave up the use of an automobile. This is really where this space began, as a way to catalogue, collect, and share my experiences and reactions to a life of movement and adventure while attempting to live without hypocrisy to my ideals. There were successes but it’s hard not to call this a failure. Not the experiment necessarily, but the ideal of living without hypocrisy while trying to remain integrated into society. There are always terms and conditions. It was a success in the way that all of life is: I learned. About myself, about the world, about others. I carry those lessons with me everywhere.

There was a few years I gave up summer.  Like a lot of things in life it wasn’t as intentional as it was cumulative and emergent. I was a ski bum turned ski professional, pursuing this career that brought me to New Zealand for Southern Hemisphere winters.

I learned to fly. I found encouragement from my friends and have discovered the in the miracle of flight a passion that continues to amaze me.

Recently, I decided to serve. This decision was not impulsive but a reflection of a nagging curiosity about the demands and adventure of military service and a desire to give back to this wild experiment of a country that has served me so well. The ramifications of a decision like this have drastic and sudden impacts to any life, especially one built around as much freedom as I’ve become accustomed to, I’m still navigating my place in the military and what it means for me to e a service member. This is a developing story and I’m still very much learning it myself as I experience it.

I’m an Aires. I’m passionate and energetic, but easily influenced and don’t always have the best follow-through. I’m thoughtful and try to think creatively. I like people but can often be awkward and introspective. I do much better with one or two than five to ten. I like art and music. I play the guitar and other instruments. I like to draw but am pretty poor at it. I like to take pictures because it’s easier. I love to sit down with a book in front of the fire almost as much as skiing off a mountain. It’s way easier. I love food and coffee and used to be a gardener. I’m easygoing but can be impatient. I like real things and beautiful people, inside or out. I have little tolerance for people’s bullshit and craziness, despite the abundance of my own.

I like to write. I feel like the more I write the quieter my mind becomes, the more I understand my own jumbled-up thoughts. I easily forget. I like to-do lists and little scraps of paper with good ideas. This site is essentially a big shoebox for those scraps of paper. And some other things too.

I care about life, about doing good and living with a purpose. About leaving things better than you found them. I am human, I make mistakes, I fail. I travel by foot, ski, wheel, and occasionally wing. I like to push myself, mentally and physically. Occasionally I compete in organized events, but more often I’m just finding my own boundaries in the mountains.

Along the way I see things, and consider them. I nostalgic for my youth, my family. I am often in high or dangerous places and I have ample time to consider my insignificance. I like to write about what I experience and how it Influences my perspective. I think we’re born to move, to explore, that in all the places and people we meet are hidden messages that help us find our place and peace with the world. I am still looking for mine.

Most of all, I’m embarrassed and excited to share this space, and humbled you took a minute to read this, to visit my page and take a moment to learn a bit about me. Thank you again for finding this space, and taking the time to find out a little bit more about who’s behind it all. There’s not exactly a reward for its return, like there might be for a physical journal, but I hope you find value here as a sort of return for your kindness of reading, of taking part. For me it’s rewarding thinking someone might have actually read this far, even my mom. If you want to take part even more, leave me a comment, let me know if you’re still here, because I am.

I believe we all have a great deal to share and teach each other, but that our patience is tried in a world where we each need to shout to be heard. So thank you again for finding this space. Thanks for taking part.

Be Well,

Tim